Julia Rae

We have all heard of writing letters to our future husbands or wives. Wondering... Pondering... Dreaming... Imagining... Hoping... Desiring... Praying... Believing in faith... Trusting.

What about letters to our future children? I've written a letter to my previous unborn child, Gloria, which was part of a process of healing from choosing to have an abortion. She was His beautiful treasure and will forever be present with Him. Thank you, Jesus.

Now I have the honor and privilege to write to my future children. Though a different season, I find myself at times filled with the same yearning, wondering, pondering, dreaming, imagining, hoping, desiring, praying, believing in faith, trusting... May the Lord bless Frank and I in due season. In the meantime, the Father seems to share tidbits of His heart with me for them and about them from time to time. Today was one of those special moments, and I wanted to remember it to be able to share with my future daughter, Julia Rae, when the right time rolls around to encourage her in her walk of faith.

Dearest Julia Rae,

A couple months ago, I felt the Lord asking me, "They are mine. Will you teach them about Me? Will you lead them to Me?" It was so heavy on my heart. He was asking whether or not I would teach you children and lead you to Himself since He was already sharing His jealousy for you. It was an exciting, yet fearful moment. All I could do as my heart raced was say, "Yes, Lord. Help me to do so. Help me to lead them to You and You alone. Yes. Yes Yes."

 On January 10, 2014, the Lord spoke to me specifically about YOU. I was working full-time at Wernersville State Hospital. It was the afternoon, and I was doing my normal routine of preparing two days' worth of tickets since it was Friday. In the midst of the normal day to day, He shared His heart and a piece of your future with me. Here's what I experienced, saw and heard.

Your dad and I apparently had been putting some money away as we were able to for your college fund. The day came when you decided that you did not want to go to college but wanted to take that money and sow into people's lives. You said, "I don't need to go to college to do what I really want to do in life which is to sow into people's lives like my mom and dad do."

I heard other people saying, "Don't let your parents brainwash you. Find out who you are. Use that money to invest in yourself and your education and future."

To which you boldly responded: "My parents didn't force me to choose this, nor did they brainwash me. They just simply led me to Him, and I freely choose to continue to follow Him as He leads me. I don't need to waste money to find out who I am. I know who I am. I am in Christ. I don't need to invest in myself when He has already invested all of Himself in me. He is my teacher, and my education is experiencing life with Him. And my future... He told me to set my eyes on His Kingdom and everything else would fall into place. He told me not to worry and to cast my cares on Him. My future is in Him, and that's exactly the way I want it to be."

Then I heard your dad say to a friend, "She's totally her mother's daughter."

That was the end of what I saw and heard. Later that day over a caramel flan latte on a date night with your dad at Starbucks, I delightfully expressed what the Lord showed me. I felt so honored to be your mother. I felt so proud that you stepped out in boldness to stand for what YOU wanted to stand for which was Christ and Christ alone. People may misunderstand you, but as long as your focus and hope are in Christ, "those who wait upon the Lord will never be ashamed." I look forward to seeing you grow and mature in His love and understanding. I don't want to live vicariously through you, so I pray that the Lord would continue to call you to Himself and have His way in you, precious one. You may seem timid at times, but you are passionate for your closest Friend and Coming King. His Spirit empowers you to do whatever He asks you to do. You are as gentle as a dove, but as bold as a lion. It's so cool that He knows every hair on your head, but even your whole life before you are even born. I get to pray over shortcomings and bumps along your journey as well as rejoice over you being more than a conqueror in Christ and decisions before I even see you! He's so neat!

It is time for your father and I to leave Starbucks because we need to go home and continue investing our time and efforts into a discouraged man of God and friend, helping him to lean on the Lord. You will do the same for many in the future.

We love you, and look forward to meeting you. :-)

Blessings,
Mom